I used to be a farmer

** I wrote most of this post in the early summer- sorry for the delay.  More recent updates are coming soon- promise!**

Through my adult life I have worn many different hats.  My first real job and career was as a farmer.  At 18 I started working for an organic vegetable farm in Massachusetts and fell in love- mostly I loved the feeling of being so connected to my survival.  It was a crucial point in my development for sure and it left a lasting impression in addition to introducing me to some amazing people.  Eventually I worked at a farm that also had animals and learned the basics of husbandry.  This left an impression as well.

Yup, that's me on the tractor

I went to college and eventually decided to attain my degree in Family & Consumer Science  with a focus on secondary education.  I taught high school for 3 years and LOVED it.  When we moved to MN and I left my job behind I wasn't prepared for how much I would miss it.  For months after we moved and people would ask me what I did I would say, "I used to teach."  I couldn't think of myself as a stay at home mom.  I still identified as a working mother and it took months to make the switch internally.  I underestimated how difficult it would be not to be earning a paycheck (the first real time since I was a teenager), and honestly it's difficult not to get any accolades for your hard work.  No one cares if you took initiative to unload the dishes for the 4th time in a day, or sweep, or keep the kids happy all day with no yelling.  I know how taxing all of these seemingly simple tasks are. But alas if you work hard there is no short term payoff, no promotion, no raise, no public recognition.  Of course the long term payoff is what we're all in it for... time will tell.  All the same, I do miss my job teaching high school.

This spring Ada and I went and picked up some pullets: one barred rock, one Rhode Island red, and one gold star.  They started off living in the garage as it's very well protected from the elements and predators.  This is a little act of me regaining a sense of identity that feels like me.  As I have mentioned before, the move to MN has been tough on me and after clawing through the first year I feel happier here than I thought I would.  I feel hopeful and look at this new place as an adventure rather than something to tolerate for the next several years.  I see the benefits of being at home with the kids, and I see value in what I do.  The chicks represent my feeling of a fresh start in this place.  That there is vibrancy and opportunity for things that would have been difficult if not impossible in our former life situation.  This has been a crucial transformation of thought.  And the rest of the family is a fan of these little ladies too.

Now I didn't specifically write anything about Father's day on here but in case you didn't know, I am married to the best dad around.  He is adored by the girls and makes an effort to be present when he's home even though he works long hours.  Perhaps the best thing though is that he sets a good example for the girls on being a good husband.  I am so lucky to have him on my team and love that he gets me and loves me all the same.  AND... he does amazing things for me like when we were away in New England he built me a chicken coop!  He even used the scraps in the garage so it didn't cost much- LOVE IT!  I know I may not be a typical woman but this was a tremendously romantic gesture and I simply love it.  To me, it shows that Tony is making an effort to fulfill a little dream/goal I have had and embrace all of my crazy.  I would be lying if I said the idea of being responsible for three little chicks in our relatively small yard with predators around, and winters in our future didn't scare me a little.  But he believes in me/us and that kind of support has been a huge reason why this transition year has landed me in a positive head space.

Just love this man.

My reality is certainly different than I would have imagined it when I was 20 and driving around a field on a tractor or hoeing some lettuce but now that I'm where I am I feel so lucky that life has brought me here.